Hello, again!
I have been away for almost three months now. Camping did not allow me easy access to post, nor did I have the energy to write a lot.
During my time at the all-girls camp in New Hampshire I became really in tuned with who I am and how I look to others. They say the voice of a child is probably the most truthful voice of reason, so working with children (and some adults who acted like children, not a bad thing though) was quite eye opening. I was surprised that I went through even more soul searching after my isolation in Singapore. However going from the separation of social communication to almost no privacy was, mentally, a war zone. I fought with myself almost every day as I tried to become a friendly bystander instead of a creepy stalker while working every day in the camp office. Children never remembered my name, but that wasn't too much of a hardship. What really brought me down was my socializing with the other staff members. You should take note: if you do not practice socializing daily, you will become "the loser."
Other duly noted epiphanies was my new goal of foreign service. I will be taking the test to become a foreign service officer, however I need to study like my life depends on it. (No joke. Technically it does.) Though I am not as "fresh" as the newly graduated Masters degree holders, I still should try out of principal. I went to school for International Studies - a degree that is popular, but has so many career branches - so it was foolish for me to not pursue it further. However, when I did graduate college I was not in the mindset of making a life, I was more into making a moment. Now I see I DO have the potential to make a life for myself, something that has goals and nice shinny things! All things I don't need a husband or a family to accomplish. I am not a dependent person, no one in my family is, so here I am DECLARING a new goal, (that is obtainable), to become a foreign service officer. BAM!
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The night before the last day of camp, everyone on camp was given a "wish boat." We had to write our wish on it and when the sun had set we would sing at the campfire (at our beach front) and set the wish boat into the water with a candle. My wish, which was hastily made, was "Never give up. Always try." I wrote this several times on the wish boat to get my point across. (To who? I don't know.) Just know that I learned at camp that thinking too much can get you into trouble, and a spit second thought can have the most clarity.
